You Have My Whole Heart for My Whole Life

December was the last time I wrote on here. Life has been busy, to say the least. Mostly planning a wedding (which turned out beautifully in my opinion), a fun-filled honeymoon, then the passing of my Pappaw right after that kept us busy for a while. We finally moved my furniture and belongings a few days ago and it allowed me the opportunity to unpack all of our wedding gifts the next day.

So, that brings us to today. I think that a 7 month summary wrapped up into that last paragraph is a great accomplishment for a girl whose mother was once told during an elementary parent-teacher conference (which were always a joke because I got only good things said to her thus rendering them pointless for my mother to actually attend though she went to every single one of them, no lie), "She does write a LOT on her assignments." Now- onto the photos!**

Today's blog will be dedicated to the wedding! There are so many I love, maybe I will have to do a separate post of the ones that are too cute to not share but I just don't have here yet.... Here are a few, or quite a few rather, of my faves:

**All photos courtesy of www.birdsofafeatherphotos.com
Plus, go "like" them on Facebook and show them some love https://www.facebook.com/BirdsofaFeatherPhotos

Ok, like I said... Quite a few!  There were over 1000 amazing photos and I tried to pick my favorites but there are just so many. And Birds of a Feather was so great and talented! Plus, we were so blessed to be gifted these photos from them. 

My heart is full

When the Heart Weeps

We have all heard about it... watched the news about... and cried about it.
The brutal killing of 27 innocent adults and young children. I cried when I first heard about it but then I just became angry... very angry. I cannot wrap my head or heart around why this has happened. But then, I literally cried like a baby over the situation. I am not sure anyone will ever be able to fathom why this young man decided that it was in his best interest to cause such massive destruction. Our entire church congregation prayed for everyone involved today and our pastor made a good point- the governor of CT stated, "Evil visited this community today." I truly believe this. And our pastor's point was that "God always shows up in these situations." I think that you have to believe this to be true, for I am not sure how else your heart can heal if you don't.

Working in a field where I regularly see children in situations that would turn the stomach of even the biggest, baddest men and having Shawn himself be a cop, I cannot help but bring my thoughts to the first responders at the scene of the shooting. These men and women had to see every child and teacher, every blood spatter, every sad and gruesome aspect of the scene that we cannot even imagine.

We are constantly criticizing cops for being inappropriate or "bad cops" when in reality there are so many out there that do such a great amount of good. We forget the things that their eyes shield ours from. We are unable to comprehend the feeling they get when they are walking up to any traffic stop or 911 call, as it was in this case, not knowing if that person is waiting behind a door with a gun.

Then I think about the teachers- most of us have read about the young teacher, Ms. Soto, who tried to hide her children in closets and was killed in doing so. The custodian who ran through the hallways trying to warn everyone. The principal and school psychologist who were reported to try and "lunge" at the gunman. Talk about heroes.

Any act like this is sad- and we have had so many in the recent years. But when innocent, naive children are involved it always seems that much worse. Their presents wrapped under the tree, a time of year where kids are excited and happy, suddenly turns into a family's most devistating moments.

My heart is weeping.

Chivalry

“A gentleman is someone who does not what he wants to do, but what he should do.” 
― Haruki Murakami

I am standing in line to day at Gates on Linwood. After being around someone else eating it, I had a sudden craving for... I say sudden, but let's be honest, I have talked about getting Gates for about a month and a half and had yet to do so. You may wonder why one would wait so long just to get some BBQ.

Let's review the reasons:
1. I am trying to tone up a bit before the wedding. Gates does fit well into my regimen.
2. It is not all that close to my home.
3. It strikes utter fear in me to go in there. Their famous "MAY I HELP YOU?" yell that you hear as soon as you place your hand on the door outside the building scares the crap out of me.... I never know what I want when they are yelling, even if I do actually know what I will be ordering since I get the same thing... every time. Then they just stare, and stare, and stare, giving you that "Aren't you going to speak little girl" look. It's horrifying.

So when I arrived in the parking lot, I had to mentally prepare to go inside. Which brings me to my story...

After counting to 10 and taking some deep breaths, I made it through the ordering process, paid my bill, and was watching them prepare my order when a gentleman dressed in a nice suit walked in, ordered after they yelled at him, and stood behind me to wait for his own meal. That is when I heard it.

He was talking under his breath as he stood there. I made out the phrases "Get it, girl," "Damn, girl, damn," and "I sure hope someone is taking rreeealll good care of that ass," numerous times mixed with the occasional "hmm-hmmm-hmmmm."  For a little less than 5 minutes I just stood there, looking straight ahead, trying as hard as I could to flash my ring finger, very obviously ignoring the obnoxious man behind me.

What. The. Heck.

When did we become a society that finds this behavior acceptable?

I was watching a show on tv today and they were talking about dating and chivalry. The men were arguing that in the "modern day" the use of phones and computers for texting and such was what women should expect. That holding a door open is in the past. That women should be looking for things other than a chivalrous man. And I wanted to scream.

Don't get me wrong-- I can take care of myself. I have a good job. I pay my own bills. I do not NEED somebody to take care of me. But the first date I had with Shawn involved him opening my doors, paying for dinner and our tickets to the concert we went to (and even still I have to be very sneaky and pay for things when he does not know it) and him being a chivalrous man. He still does these things... he tells me I am beautiful (me... not my ass), he holds my doors, and he protects me. And it won me over. I do not need a man to do these things for me but I like that he is a man that wants to do them. I am blessed to have him. And we will be teaching our future children these values.

So... In our society, is chivalry really dying?

Random Thoughts

Today has been filled with random thoughts.... here are a few:

-This is how I feel right now! Sick, tired, but not totally down. Add a few empty Puffs Plus boxes in the mix. I think she might actually look better than me though.

Have you ever started getting sick and decided you would not allow it to happen. That's how I felt three days ago.... upon realizing the cold coming on I went straight to CVS and bought Mucinex. Ps- have you ever taken this? It's a (very expensive) miracle drug for congestion. I really thought it was the answer. Wrong. It helps some during the day, but my somewhat sleepless nights have been filled with a stuffed up yet runny nose, coughing, and holding my head over my Vicks Vapor Rub Humidifier that I have set up by my bed. To top it off, I think the coughing did something to my ear drum because this morning it hurts with any semi-loud sound I hear. Well, it could be worse.

-I realized looking in the mirror today that I am pale. Then I noticed I still have tan lines... and I have a ways to go.

-Suposebly (yeah, let's not worry about the spelling of that) is not a word. Yes, I already know this. But a certain person said it to me the other day. And it still makes me chuckle to think about them actually saying this. And cry a little.

-I just really would like a weekend by the beach soon. Maybe another girls weekend trip should happen since there are a few of them I don't get to see too often. This cold weather is already getting to me. And it has just started cooling down. Ugh, I am truly not meant to live in this weather.

-Dave's surprise 60th bday party was last night and it was a ton of fun! I'm glad he is my bonus-dad and I'm happy to get to celebrate with him and our family and friends.

-I am getting no less than 3 political ads in the mail daily. That's a lot of wasted trees.

-I had a little boy ask me the other day what music I liked. He then told me, "I listen to K-Love. It's my favorite station, because I am a Christian." My first thought were "how sweet" and "I'm glad he says that with such conviction at such a young age." Then he continued, "My second favorite is Eminem." He let me know his album has no cuss words in it, clearly a Walmart version, which is good. But the contrast between the two is drastic. And a bit humorous.

-Starting out a conversation with "how many can I have until I black out?" is not the smartest thing in the world... and neither are you for that matter.

That concludes my random thoughts... they are a bit boring. But they're what today has given me.